Dissatisfaction With The Comedy Scene

Currently, I’m in Moscow. I’m staying in a hostel. I’ve been having even more doubts than ever about being a comedian because I can’t be arsed to hang around the group that want to be “comedians”. They are just plain and un-inspiring. I’m quite astonished that Russell Brand managed to sit through all of that to become a comedian. Continue reading

Having A Solo Beta Romance Stroll

I watched the film “Arthur” this afternoon and was left feeling romantic.

I’ve been through enough break ups and women to know that romance is a fantasy. My advice to you would be to forget romance altogether and let the women worry about that. Yet, every time I watch a romance film I’m left feeling oddly satisfied and peaceful. However, I did come to realise that most romances are set with one of the characters being poor and creative while the other character is reasonably successful or in some cases from a wealthy background. “Titanic” is a classic example.

I can’t tell you what that ‘means’ but I find it interesting as a writer.

Still, if I watch an action film I’m left feeling like an action hero; if I watch a psychological film I’m suddenly questioning my sanity; and if I watch a horror film I’m scared shitless. Films seem to share there story with me and make me vibrate at a similar frequency for a while.

Oddly enough, whenever I watch a romance, it doesn’t take me long to draw something romantic into my life. Unlike any other film. For example, tonight I decided to take a walk to connect with God, so I strolled around my neighbourhood while being mindful of my surroundings, the passing cars and the buildings. I bought a chocolate bar from the local shop, felt enormously grateful for everything and then took my shoes off to walk home barefoot. Then I sat outside my flat on the ledge that extends over the door of my apartment block.

Within minutes, I was in a conversation with a girl named “Musa” who told me her name translates to “love”.

Some part of my brain wanted to invite her in for a cup of tea, but my other brain said, “She’s not pretty, I’m not attracted to her.” So I let her walk on, even though she persisted and continued to talk to me for around 15 minutes asking about myself. Still, off she went. And I was left wondering:

How comes when I watch a romantic film, I draw these things into my life, but when I watch an action film, I don’t suddenly have to jump out of the way of a car in the next hour, or catch someone shoplifting or even see someone fall over in the street and have to ask them if they’re okay?

I think I might naturally vibrate at a frequency of romance.

I love writing, and even that seems to be a romantic profession. But the more I discover about girls, the more I discover that romance is a fantasy, like action, or horror. But I think EVERY SINGLE THING on this Earth is a fantasy – considering that we’re all looking at the world from different view points. I think the best thing you can do is to understand what fantasy you want to project, and then relentlessly and fearlessly communicate it. And you know what, I’m the kind off guy who fucking loves water, moonlight and bare foot strolls. Some might say that’s beta. I say fuck the concept of alpha and beta. For once, I’m not going to succumb to “pua mentality” and deny myself the luxury of walking along a city river in the moon light, just because it’s a “beta romance fantasy”. Even if I’m taking the strolls alone for the rest of my life, that’ll be half an hour spent in bliss.

I’m useless without my puppets

I’m the fucking boss of the world. Although today I woke up and didn’t feel like it. I realise after going to the gym and working out and listening to rap music, and generally doing all the things that men who are good with chicks are supposed to do. But I stumbled upon some new philosophy. – Why the fuck am I using this phrase: stumbled upon? – came across, found – discovered, – thought about – understood – realised – clicked on – clicked over to – spawned – awoke to a new philosophy. I awoke to a new philosophy. – I had a thought? I “woke up” – understood, found, discovered, had in my head I thought a new thought – But I had a thought. But I had a new thought. ß that really takes it’s impression down. Perhaps that’s a good thing. I can only guess. I had a new thought. That none of this will make you a “natural”.

I believe that the idea of being a natural is a lie. I think that “naturally” men do not understand women. I’ve seen Nash Grier and Dallas Cameron on YouTube and they are “naturals”. And by that I mean their fathers have given them the mindsets and affirmations which make a man believe in himself and have high self-esteem.

These mindsets may attract a person to rap music and fighting and other manly past times. But they won’t make them “naturally” good with women. They might have more of a chance to be around women as women will see their status around other men and choose them to mate with. But they are not born with the innate ability to manipulate, understand or “play” women. Such talent only comes with practice.

I now understand that you can listen to all the rap music you want, hit the gym as much as you want, work on your career as much as you want, but none of these obsessions will make you “good with women”. Yes they may attract more than the average beta, they may make you look better to other men and they will improve your value obviously. But they won’t give you the hours spent with women and the mistakes made by “saying the wrong thing” and ultimately, the social skill set which is required to make a sexual partnership work.

The only thing, and I mean the ONLY thing which will make you “good with women” is talking to them on a regular basis. Pursuing them on a regular basis. It IS a skill. It IS the same as playing the guitar or lifting weights, or learning a language. The difficulty with the skill is that it MUST be learnt in public. You must fail around other guys, you must fail in front of your parents, you must fail in front of the world to acquire this skill set. Tony Robbins said people are rewarded for what they practice in private, but pick-up is not a skill practiced in private. And to practice it in public you need resilience, determination and ultimately: complete sociopathy.

You must not give a fuck about what anybody thinks of you.

Men or women, or co-workers or bosses, or even the president of America.

Because if you care, you will not act, and therefore you will not acquire the skill.

I think I started this entry with a route to explain why I feel like shit in the mornings. And how I can combat that to feel amazing. Perhaps it’s that I have to realise this, I can’t play game, without a woman. And therefore I think it’s time to redefine what having “game” is. Because it’s not something which runs through my veins first thing in the morning. That’s a different skill. This is the skill of becoming a puppeteer and making people dance around me how I see fit.

And I can’t show off that skill, unless I’m around people. I’m completely useless, without my puppets.